🛡 The Supple Battalion

Quite long ago, in a land far, far away there lived a young man named Peter. He had thick, wavy hair that was the color of autumn leaves, bright green eyes like freshly sprouted grass, and a body so fit it would make Michelangelo's David weep with envy.

Most days Peter could be found practicing his archery or swordplay under the watchful eye of his mentor, Sir Archibald, a seasoned knight of considerable might and experience. However, one day Sir Archibald left on a mission to deliver important papers to King Leofold in a distant kingdom and entrusted young Peter with the task of keeping the fort safe while he was gone.

Peter was excited at first because he was finally given some responsibility, but as days turned into weeks, he grew bored. Every day was the same – wake up, sharpen arrows, train sword fighting techniques, eat dinner, go to bed. There was no excitement, no adventure, no new experiences to look forward to. That is until one dark and stormy night when something extraordinary happened.

While Peter was on patrol around the castle walls, he saw a flickering light in the distance. Intrigued, he followed the light deeper into the woods until he stumbled upon an ancient tree hollowed out by time and weather. Inside the hollow, Peter discovered a strange book covered in dust and cobwebs. Without hesitation, he picked up the book and began to read.

The book, "The Tale of the Flexible Prince," was filled with epic adventures, enchanting magic spells, and mythical beasts from around the world. It centered on the story of a young prince named Felix who uncovered a special technique allowing him to bend his body like rubber. Armed with this incredible skill, Felix became the greatest warrior in the realm, able to dodge any attack and strike down even the fiercest foe with ease thanks to his uncanny motion range.

As Peter continued reading, he became more and more captivated by the idea of becoming as flexible as Felix. He knew it would take years of practice and dedication, but he was determined to master this skill. So, every day after completing his duties at the castle, Peter would retreat to his room and begin practicing the stretching exercises described in the book.

Weeks passed, and Peter's body grew stronger and more limber than ever before. His back arched like a bow, letting the back of his head touch his own buttocks. But still, he couldn't quite achieve the tight backfold, the signature move of his hero, Prince Felix.

Then one fateful evening while practicing alone in his chambers, Peter decided to try something different. Instead of simply bending backwards, he took a small oaken chest that was much heavier than it appeared and placed on top of his arched chest, chuckling at his own cleverness.

With a deep breath, Peter slowly lowered his shoulders toward his own buttocks, under the added weight of the heavy chest resting upon him. Sweat dripped from his brow as he strained with all his might to complete the impossible feat.

Just when it seemed hopeless, something miraculous happened – for a very brief moment, Peter felt a very light touch against his butt. A tingling warmth spread across his bent body as he couldn't believe what just happened. However, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't recreate the feeling again, leaving him wondering if he had imagined it.

The next morning, Sir Archibald finally returned from his mission with great news: King Leofold had agreed to send troops and supplies to help defend the kingdom against invaders threatening its borders! Everyone cheered and celebrated the good news, but none were happier than Peter, who now believed he possessed some form of magic within himself to help protect those dear to him.

From that day forward, Peter continued honing his backbending skill, now with Sir Archibald's strong hands guiding him through every stretch, bend and twist. He seemed impressed by the Prince Felix book Peter found, just as much as he was amazed at the progress his young apprentice made in such short time of his absence.

Sir Archibald believed that the old book contained mysteries beyond what met the eye, and so he and Peter devoted themselves to mastering every contortion detailed within The Tale of the Flexible Prince. Even the legendary Octafold, which Prince Felix had learned from his former nemesis, the cunning young wizard Foldazar, who would become his passionate lover and trusted guide in the later chapters.

Years passed by, and the kingdom prospered under the guidance of King Leofold and his loyal knights. Peter grew into a strong and capable captain, with a dozen of younger boys who trained tirelessly to perfect their own backfolds.

Known as The Supple Battalion, these brave warriors could not be called unbending, but rather unbreakable, with spines that arched like a powerful bow and folded like an enchanted book. Even the kingdom's mages marveled at how effortlessly they performed these feats during intense training sessions and fierce battles alike.

A clever mechanism invented by Sir Archibald helped the young warriors to remain backfolded for extended periods of time. The tension in their folded frames was enough to deflect arrows, letting them engage the enemy while wearing only a thin coat of protective oil instead of cumbersome suits of armor.

And so it came to pass that the name of Captain Peter Gumby became synonymous with victory against impossible odds, as did his signature battle cry: "I am rubber, you are glue!" Inspiring countless generations of warriors yet to come.

The legend of The Supple Battalion spread far beyond the borders of their kingdom, becoming the stuff of whispered bedtime tales told to children and awestruck adults alike. Their story is remembered even today, inspiring generations to strive for greatness, overcome adversity, and remain unbreakable when all seems lost.