πŸ₯³ Funny Renaissance

Walther's secret training and first performance as a contortionist!Reading Time: about 8-10 minutes

We know that Walther came to visit his contortionist cousin Leslie after a whole year not seeing him, meanwhile he was so inspired by his previous time with Leslie that he spent this whole year stretching every day.

The old comfy chair in Walther's room did wonders to his body, it was amazing, in all these years he had never realized he could fall in love with this chair one day. He could sit in it with his feet behind his head while reading a book. He could stretch into a backbend between the chair's soft arms, his chest would sink between, deeper and deeper every few minutes, and after a few months of daily training he could easily tilt his head back onto his own butt. The cheststand became one of his favorite poses while relaxing in the chair and eventually he learned to cross his legs in a tight backbend and lay his arms on top of his own thighs, which was extremely comfortable after he got absolutely used to relax in that position.

Splits were also part of the every day workout, he would put one foot on the seat of the chair, the other on the smooth parquet floor, wearing pajamas and socks made sliding the legs apart the question of how much his joints and muscles could take, but after getting the full split it was only natural to keep going for the oversplit and even use an extra chair to sink deep between them.

The bath tub was also an amazing training device but we'll skip that for now.

All this was a secret from Walther's mother who was absolutely clueless about any of the above practices. She always disliked everything weird and Walther was 1000% sure she would ruin what he's enjoying so much.

The first person who learned about Walther's new skills was his cousin Leslie, the one who inspired him in the first place. Leslie's mother was too liberal, practiced yoga herself and even used to be a nudist when she was younger. For some reason she was convinced it would make her son a better person if he enjoyed the most questionable stuff: extreme contortion, wearing long hair, makeup, girl's clothes, even strings and leotards. Leslie didn't even have a single pair of normal boxers because that kind of stuff was "eww".

And so these two very different families had to spend a whole summer together. Not that they had anything against each other, Walther absolutely admired his cousin Leslie, meanwhile their moms spent whole days discussing each other's values with much curiosity.

"I don't know, I'm still so worried every time seeing Leslie doing all these contortions, my heart is just pounding thinking he could break something to the rest of his life!"
"But think of it, sis, when you're in court, can you just forget some important documents or laws?"
"Unthinkable! I study for hours a day and I'm always up to date, I'd never forget anything! Why?"
"Well, Leslie is training for hours every day, too. I trained him myself since birth and I think he's really good at it. It's like, you're driving a car, you wouldn't just bump into a random pole on the road, completely out of the blue. Don't worry, sis, he knows what he's doing!"
"Hmm, but it still looks dangerous. Maybe it's just my job that I care so much about people's safety but I'd definitely not let my Walther do something like that."
"Why, but he's so slender and athletic and he moves like a kitten. If I didn't know better I'd think he's very flexible."
"What! What are you talking about, sis, I'm sure Walther couldn't even touch his toes..."

Walther rolled his eyes as he overheard the conversation.

Leslie giggled: "Wow, those two still got no clue! You know, Walther, you're like James Bend, agent 006.9, so many tricks up your sleeve that nobody has any clue about!"
"Only because you don't have a long tongue and know how to keep secrets."
Leslie stuck his tongue out and licked the tip of his own nose. Walther laughed: "No way... maaan, just what else can you do?!"
"Some things you still don't know about... And maybe some things even I don't know about... Hmm."

"Walther! Oh good, I thought I'd never find you!"
"You wanted anything, ma?"
"Me and sis decided to go to the Ren fair and she's taking Leslie along. You want to come too?"
"Sure, mom, but what's a Ren fair?"
"It's short for Renaissance."
"???"
"People will dress up in medieval costumes and it's in the historical part of the nearby town. It's like going back a few centuries ago but you only get the fancy stuff, no robbers on every road, no beggars all over the streets, no everything and everyone smelling like rot and horse poo."
Walther giggled. "No poo! Then I'm coming too!"
"Very funny! Which takes us to the second part of the question. I think since you like to be funny, this outfit might look good on you..." she showed him the screen of her phone.
"Wow, it's... it's so... short..."
"Hmm, yeah, my thoughts exactly. Not my taste at all, it's just sis thinks it's not a proper vacation if you don't try new things... But yes, I also think it's way too revealing for a boy. Let me try to find something else..."
"Nooo! I really love it, mom! I just had to pinch myself as thought I was dreaming for a second! That outfit is so cool!"
"What? Well... in that case I will order it, of course... You sure you would really wear something like this, though? It would be a waste of money to buy it and then have you being too shy to actually put it on."
"No no, I will totally wear it if Leslie is coming too. With him around I'm not afraid to wear something like this. I'm sure this outfit will look even more... *cough*... I mean I'm sure I will look perfect next to him!"
"Oh yes, that makes sense."

"Hey cousin, what do you think?"
"Wow, it's amazing! How much more could they cut!"
"I know, right? I'm so happy about the cut!"
"Yeah, it's like it's made for contortionists, you could just bend in any way so easily in it!"
"I know, it's such a shame I'm not a contortionist, I'd love to perform in this..."
"Oh, but you are! You just haven't done your first performance yet. How about you do it tomorrow? And you already have a perfect outfit!"
"What! No, mom will be there..."
"So what! Do you want to keep bending in a closet for the rest of your life? Then all the next generations find will be your bendy skeleton."
"Hah hah... But really I just can't risk mom seeing it..."
"Yes you can! It's a perfect opportunity, do you think you'll get the chance to change your mom's opinion ever again?"
"True... I suppose you're right... While her mind's on the Ren fair, she might be in the right mood to see it..."
"Of course! Did you hear her? She thinks contortion is super dangerous, that's why you absolutely can't fail this one. It all depends on how fail proof we can make it, so if you succeed it will be a life changer, but if you fail..."
"She will be all like I TOLD YOU!! Sooo what should we do?"
"Just show me every pose that's super easy for you to do. If you can hold it for a minute with your eyes closed then we'll keep it. Then we'll arrange it in some nice way to keep the best for the last, you have to go from simple to advanced to keep the audience on the edges of their seats."
"Ah, I'm already nervous... What if I screw up some simple pose..."
"Don't say it! You're already super lucky to get this far, you're on vacations, my mom is explaining contortion to your mom, now we got this Ren fair, the perfect outfit too, I'm sure your luck will stretch much more from this point. Plus you got this white rabbit on your side!"
"Then why I still feel so nervous..."
"Oh! I got an idea! I was doing yoga every day when I was a kid and I know one meditation you can do to fully relax and feel super confident."
"There is something like that?"
"Sure is. So let's do that first and then we'll rehearse your fail proof performance..." 😘


Walther's model and outfit were created by RomarovArt. The background based on the Red Crow Inn.

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What do you think? πŸ˜„
Oh hey! I have that same tavern in Daz3D. :3 Love it! Read more
Thought this tavern would look good with the medieval outfit. I love it too, it has 100+ models and it's HUGE, if only there were more products like that but it seems to be unique. Read more
Great pose and a great story Yuni. The costume suits the title; just a little absurd. I wonder what onlookers would've thought of such an outfit 600 years ago. I'm curious about Leslie's costume now, and what his meditative technique entails. I hope Walther's mother will warm up to his secret talent. Read more
Thank you so much!!
In Witcher 3 there are some jugglers and thieves with a bare torso and a hood, it seems like a fine outfit for the dark age. This one is funny, think it's meant to parody aristocracy.
I haven't thought about Leslie's part of the show yet, as always just wrote story after this picture was done, just to connect it to the previous events. Guess my tales are more like tails for those pictures 😜 Read more
A wonderful pic, and for some reason I found the story really touching! I'm rooting for everything to work out between his mother and him. This friendship between the two lads is so adorable! And damn, if only stretching was that effective irl... I'd start practicing right away! XDXD
-Alldenspa Read more
Thank you so much! When posting I thought this story kind of failed to turn out interesting but if you think it's good, that makes me feel better about it 😊 Read more
Maybe we should all meet in that tavern and watch Walther artistic skills. With a huge horn full of mead circling. Read more
Well, in a way we're already doing that 😁 Read more
For a second I was like, wait where’s the foot? Read more
Of course it's in the armpit where it belongs 😜 Read more
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DISCLAIMER: ALL WORKS ON THIS SITE ARE PURELY FICTIONAL AND TAKE GREAT LIBERTIES WITH THE HUMAN FORM, EXAGGERATING AND DISTORTING IT TO MAKE FOR A STRIKING VISUAL. THESE DEPICTIONS ARE NOT ANATOMICALLY ACCURATE AND SHOULD ONLY BE SEEN AS A FANTASY, NOT AS AN INSPIRATION FOR ANY REAL-LIFE ACTIVITIES.