Snail Gym

Snails have re­al­ly, re­al­ly strange bod­ies com­pared to us chick­ens. Their whole body 're­mem­bers' and re­gen­er­ates its own struc­ture very quick­ly. For ex­am­ple, if he did a nip­ple pierc­ing and lat­er changed his mind and got rid of it, there would be no trace of it in a cou­ple of hours. The same hap­pens if their skin gets scratched or wound­ed.

But that's not all they have de­rived from their an­ces­tors. An­cient snails used to live on trees and as a re­sult many of them fell down and their bro­ken bones hurt a lot! Through mil­lions of years of falling down the na­ture fi­nal­ly gave them rub­bery bones. The or­gan­ic struc­ture of their bones al­lows them to be crooked with­out break­ing and their re­gen­er­a­tion abil­i­ties would al­ways re­store the orig­i­nal state and po­si­tion of any bone!

The evo­lu­tion worked re­al­ly hard on them and al­lowed them to fall from trees with­out get­ting hurt and even sur­vive be­ing stomped on by huge wild an­i­mals who roamed the Earth in the pre­his­toric times. Iron­i­cal­ly, snails even­tu­al­ly built a civ­i­liza­tion and no longer need­ed those awe­some sur­vival skills. But it's still use­ful from time to time, for ex­am­ple some news­pa­per once told a sto­ry about a snail who sur­vived be­ing stomped on by an ele­phant oh his trip in In­dia!

Snails used to laugh a lot at the hu­man con­tor­tion­ists since any snail could do such things ef­fort­less­ly. On the oth­er hand, they en­vy hu­mans a lot be­cause snails them­selves are re­al­ly bad at lift­ing weights, so if you en­ter their gym you'd see a whole dif­fer­ent pic­ture.

First you'd see the best of Cirque du Soleil con­tor­tion­ists smok­ing ner­vous­ly in the cor­ri­dor with dark cir­cles around their eyes af­ter many sleep­less nights. So don't pro­ceed if you're an ac­tu­al con­tor­tion­ist be­cause the sight of the snail gym would shock you! And if you hap­pen to see any younger snail kids in the gym, you might end up in need of im­me­di­ate med­ical at­ten­tion be­cause the sight is sim­ply san­i­ty-bend­ing!

That's per­fect­ly nor­mal be­cause snails in­deed have some sort of yo­ga that they do be­cause stretch­ing helps them a lot to de­vel­op a beau­ti­ful body. There are tech­niques to get broad­er shoul­ders, slim­mer waist, nice­ly toned arms and abs, small­er but­tocks and so on, all by just hold­ing the body in spe­cif­ic stretchy po­si­tions.

In fact, with­out these ex­er­cis­es a snail has a high risk of de­vel­op­ing a bad pos­ture or even a hunch­back, so dai­ly back­bend­ing is very im­por­tant for them. Tra­di­tion­al­ly snails used to wear corsets made of shell-like or­gan­ic ma­te­r­i­al, but re­cent­ly more and more peo­ple are in­clined to do the stretch­ing ex­er­cis­es in­stead be­cause the corsets are just too lim­it­ing.

See al­so

All NSFW content is hidden. Click here if you want to unhide it.